When life pulls and pushes you in every direction…
Bow low and worship.
When your heart feels as though it may explode…
Bow low and worship.
When you feel as though your closest friends and family have forsaken you…
Bow low and worship.
When the report you receive from the doctor is devastating…
Bow low and worship.
I realize there are times in life where we question our very existence. We question if God has forgotten us and wonder if our circumstance is too trivial to acknowledge. We experience moments where we are not just at the end of our rope, but feel as though the rope no longer exists. We feel as though we are falling helplessly out of control in the darkest nights of our soul. We feel broken, defeated, and lonely, wondering if hope will ever be found again. We become introspective wondering if our own decisions brought us to this point. Quickly, we begin the downward spiral of confusion, over analyzing our circumstances which leads to anxiety and obsessive worrying. In the end, we walk around with shattered hearts, broken dreams, and paralyzing hopelessness. Please friend hear me…there is another way!
The past months have been mentally exhausting for me. I find as I wake each morning, there is this pit in my stomach. I know exactly what is happening. I am questioning, “Is today going to be like yesterday? Am I going to be sick and in pain? Will there ever be a day I wake up and not face the cruel reality of POTS?” I get up fighting the residual mental and physical fatigue from each previous day. It’s easy to wonder what is the point in trying when the outcome seemingly remains the same?
I am learning it is not my responsibility to know all the answers. Even though I cannot answer those tough questions, I belong to a God who can. Some may ask, “If that is the case, then why am I not better? Why are these “giants” we are facing in our lives not gone if in one breath God could demolish their existence?” I know it’s taboo to ask these questions in certain circles, but I say ASK! Ask God the tough questions. He does not cower in fear when you come to Him. He delights when you come to Him with your burdens and have communion with Him. He can handle it!
I realize how frustrating it can be to feel like you are totally in the dark. I know the daily struggle of keeping one’s eyes on Christ and not the circumstance. I am fully aware the journey is not always easy, and the outcome is not always pleasant. But, rest assured the complexities of this life are no match for your heavenly Father. He knows every hair on your head, every tear that has fallen, every heart that has been shattered. He is fully aware of every aspect of your life. When we lift our eyes from our circumstance to Him, something amazing happens. Our minds no longer remain stuck on our circumstance, but instead we begin to experience a hope we never knew existed. The very questions that once seemed so paramount seem to fade and we see with a different viewpoint…a heavenly perspective.
“And the people trusted and listened believingly that God was concerned with what was going on with the Israelites and knew all about their affliction. They bowed low and they worshipped.” Exodus 4:31
Trust this day, God is concerned with your trials and afflictions. He is not holding His breath hoping you won’t ask the tough questions. No, He is already working on your behalf, doing what only He can do. Our responsibility is not to control every circumstance, but rather how we respond to each circumstance. Ultimate faith is not knowing all the answers, but rather bowing low and worshipping the One who does. It’s trusting in what we cannot see, and believing He cares down to the very last detail. It’s not our knowledge that carries us through these afflictions, but our faith being put into action….bowing low and worshipping even when everything around us seems contrary to His way.
Beautiful! Your words speak to so many of us dealing with the same illnesses as you. Your words inspire so many. Giving hope and us strength to live a better way with or without God you lead me and so many others. Thank you and God for your creative writing…
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I read this and so many other of your post with tears streaming down my face. Thank you for sharing and letting us know that we are not the only ones who feel this way. God is in control. Thank you for reminding me of that very important fact. I do believe that through this crazy journey, mine and my family’s faith has gotten much stronger. To whom else can you cling when everything around you is falling apart? Only GOD! I ultimately believe that I will be healed. The bible says that “by His stripes we are healed” I am claiming this victory as my own. Slowly but surely I am seeing better days. One day I WILL BE NORMAL AGAIN!
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Amen! Praying the same for you! ❤️
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